ORANGE CAULIFLOWER NUGGETS

Exclusive Recipe from THE CULINARY BRO-DOWN COOKBOOK by Josh Scherer

If you go to a steam-table Chinese restaurant and get anything other than the candy-fried chicken — orange chicken, General Tso’s chicken, lemon chicken, sesame chicken, it’s all the same — you’re doing it wrong. Well, that’s not true — you’re allowed a honey walnut shrimp, or beef and broccoli, or kung pao chicken once every three visits but only to remind you how good candy-fried chicken is. That said, if you were to really boil down the essence of what’s so great about candy meat, it has everything to do with the candy, and almost nothing to do with the meat, yeah? Think about it: There could be literally anything inside that crispy coating and you wouldn’t even notice it after that sweet, spicy, acidic orange coating tongue-punches you in the flavor button. Might as well spare a chicken’s life and senselessly murder a cauliflower head instead.

INGREDIENTS

Serves 4

1 quart vegetable oil, for frying; plus 1 tablespoon

3 cups cornstarch

2 eggs

1 cup beer

2 teaspoons salt

1 head cauliflower, cut into florets

3 Thai chilies, minced; plus additional sliced chilies for garnish

1 tablespoon minced shallot

2 cloves garlic, minced

1 tablespoon grated ginger

3 big-ass oranges

1/4 cup soy sauce

1/4 cup rice wine vinegar

1/4 cup sugar

1/2 teaspoon sesame oil

White rice, for serving

Roasted sesame seeds and thinly sliced scallions, for garnish

1. Heat that quart of vegetable oil on medium-high heat in whateverthe- f*ck-vessel you use to fry foods. You want the oil to be 350°F.
2. Get out two mixing bowls. Fill the first with cornstarch, and fill the second with the eggs and beer and whisk them together. Put a teaspoon of salt in each and mix, just in case.
3. Take the cauliflower florets and dredge them in the cornstarch, then give them a quick bath in the wet ingredients, then get them back into the cornstarch, and really work to press the cornstarch into every nook and cranny. You want complete coverage here.
4. Drop the cauliflower nuggets into the fryer, making sure you don’t overcrowd the pan. That would be bad. Fry for about 6 minutes each batch, until they’re a deep golden brown. Don’t let the oil get above 350°F, because you need to fry these for a long enough time that the cauliflower steams itself from the inside out. Raw cauliflower tastes like farts, and you don’t want to eat farts.
5. Let the cauliflower nuggets drain on a paper towel and then start building your sauce. Heat that tablespoon of vegetable oil on high heat in a large sauté pan and when it starts to shimmer, add the chilies, shallot, garlic, and ginger. Stir with a wooden spoon so it doesn’t burn and everything gets evenly sweated, about 5 minutes.
6. While that’s happening, juice all three oranges into some sort of bowl or something, and then pour that into the pan, along with the soy sauce, vinegar, sugar, sesame oil, and 1 cup water. Whisk it all together in the pan, let come to a boil, and reduce for 5 or 6 minutes, until the sauce sticks to the back of a spoon. If you want the sauce to be a little bit tighter, sprinkle 1/2 teaspoon leftover cornstarch into the sauce and stir quickly to avoid lumps.
7. When the sauce is done reducing, keep it on the heat, throw in your cauliflower nuggets, and give them a good toss in the sauce. Serve on top of white rice (or not, I have no dog in this fight) and garnish with some sesame seeds, scallions, and some slices of Thai chili if you’re really trying to get froggy.

For more, check out The Culinary Bro-Down Cookbook by Josh Scherer. Published by Grand Central Publishing. Copyright © 2017 Josh Scherer.

Available August 29, 2017!

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